16 December 2007

6dp3dt

I can't stand this torture of waiting, especially now. it's christmas! I have a ton to do, a big job going on AND I am consciously trying to take it easy. but maybe all this laying low is a waste of energy (or lack of.) do I sit tight and hope for the best or say fuck it and plow forward and live my life as usual -- as a "normal" person. I don't feel very optimistic about this cycle anyway. how could I with what we experienced on transfer day? that's 2 freak car accidents in 1 month. don't forget the death of my little chilli. AND the financial stresses of all of this are really hitting hard. b has been in a state -- a total funk -- and it's making me weary. I need his support, not his depressed mood swings. yes, this IVF has been particularly rough since day one. cd 1. but this cycle, in actuality, has been going on for a year now and I'm TIRED. tired of it all! the struggles and disappointments. this constant holding of my breath... and waiting.

7 comments:

Diana said...

virtual hugs to you, i am rooting for you big time. not much longer til beta day

Fertilize Me said...

hang in there!

Cindy Nguyen said...

the waiting is pure torture!!!!

Will they have his eyes? said...

When are you going to test????

Frank N. Beans said...

waiting is hard, but you can do it!

andi said...

My fingers are crossed for you! Keep breathing - and keep hoping.
xx

Trish said...

I hear ya.
My doc's office told me no exercising in my 2ww this time. I find that super frustrating because we're staring down the barrel of IVF. And I'd REALLY like to lose some more weight before we start down that road.

We only had 4 million sperm. Do I chuck it all and say this cycle is a bust & prepare for IVF? Or do I have hope & follow orders?

It sucks.

Still rooting for you..