16 December 2007
I can't stand this torture of waiting, especially now. it's christmas! I have a ton to do, a big job going on AND I am consciously trying to take it easy. but maybe all this laying low is a waste of energy (or lack of.) do I sit tight and hope for the best or say fuck it and plow forward and live my life as usual -- as a "normal" person. I don't feel very optimistic about this cycle anyway. how could I with what we experienced on transfer day? that's 2 freak car accidents in 1 month. don't forget the death of my little chilli. AND the financial stresses of all of this are really hitting hard. b has been in a state -- a total funk -- and it's making me weary. I need his support, not his depressed mood swings. yes, this IVF has been particularly rough since day one. cd 1. but this cycle, in actuality, has been going on for a year now and I'm TIRED. tired of it all! the struggles and disappointments. this constant holding of my breath... and waiting.
Posted by tryingin2007 at 9:41 AM